The Greedy Pope

|| A Russian folktale ||

In the parish of St. Nicholas in St. Petersberg there lived a Pope. He was not very religious or wise, he served as a Pope as a duty, as long as it gave him free lodging and an allowance. One day as he walked along the road he came across an unknown man who greeted him.

“Hail, good man!” said the stranger to the Pope. “I am a traveller, new in these parts, i come seeking work. Take me with you as a companion.”

So they went on together. After they walked for miles, they grew tired and hungry. Now the Pope had a few biscuits in his cassock, and the companion he had picked up had a couple of small loaves. The Pope suggested that they eat the loaves first. The stranger agreed.

They ate the loaves; each of them ate his fill, but the loaves didn’t seem to get any smaller.

The Pope grew envious and thought he will steal them from him, they seemed to be some magic loaves after all!

After the meal the old man lay down to take a nap, but the Pope kept scheming how to steal the loaves from him. When the old man slept, the Pope drew the loaves out of his pocket and began quietly nibbling them. Surprisingly, this time they were finished!

The old man awoke and felt for his loaves; they were gone!

“Where are my loaves?” he exclaimed; “who has eaten them? Was it you, Pope?”

“No, not I, on my word!” replied the Pope.

“Well, so be it,” said the old man.

They walked and walked; suddenly the road branched off in two different directions. Well, they both went the same way, and soon reached a certain country.

In that country the King’s daughter is on death’s bed, and the King had given notice that whoever should cure his daughter he would give half of his kingdom, and half of his goods and possessions; but if any one undertook to cure her and failed, he should have his head chopped off and hung up on a stake.

The old man told the Pope that he could help the princess, so the Pope thought, “Maybe this mysterious old man is a healer” and agreed for the lure of the promised reward. They both went to the palace, calling themselves as a doctor and a priest.

They asked the King to supply them with a private room, a tub of water, a sharp sword, and a big table. Then they shut themselves up, upon the instructions of the old man, they laid the Princess on the big table, cut her into small pieces with the sharp sword, flung them into the tub of water, washed them, and rinsed them. Afterwards they put the pieces back together. When the old man breathed on them, the different pieces stuck together. When he had put all the pieces together properly, he gave them a final puff of breath. The Princess began to quiver, and then arose alive and well!

The King came to the door of their room, and cried: “In the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Ghost!”

“Amen!” they replied. “Have you cured the Princess?” asked the King. “We’ve cured her,” say the doctors. “Here she is!”

Out went the Princess to the King, alive and well. The King gave them gold and silver he had promised. The old man used only a thumb and two fingers, but the Pope seized whole handfuls, and kept on shovelling them into his satchel, and then lifting it a bit to see if he was strong enough to carry it.

At last they took their leave of the King and went their way. They buried the treasure, thinking to retrieve it on way back.

They travelled and reached another country. In that country, also, the King’s daughter was dying, and the king had proclaimed the same reward and punishment as before. The Pope, hoping to get the riches for himself, sent the old man to look for lodging and walked away on the pretext of getting food.

He went to the palace claiming he was doctor and in the same way as before he asked the King for a private room, a tub of water, a large table, and a sharp sword. He repeated the same exercise he saw the old man performed before, cut the screaming princess, washed and put her back, expecting to see all the pieces unite with each other.

He breathed on them. Lo and behold, nothing happened!

Panicked, he tried again. Nothing! He repeated the entire exercise, still nothing.

The king was horrified and sentenced the Pope to be hanged. The Pope cried and pleaded the king to find the old man who could bring the princess back to life. Soon the old man was found and brought in.

Meanwhile the noose was ready and the Pope was being led to the gallows. The old man asked the Pope: “Pope! who ate my loaves?”

“Not I, on my word! So help me Heaven, not I!”

The Pope was hoisted on to the second step. The old man repeated, “Pope! who ate my loaves?” Again the Pope denied.

He mounted the third step now his head was actually in the noose. The Pope screamed in fear, “It was me, I ate the loaves, so help me Heaven. I am most ashamed. “

The old man said, “O King! Permit me to cure the Princess. And if I do not cure her, order another noose to be got ready. A noose for me, and a noose for the Pope!”

The old man put the pieces of the Princess’s body together, bit by bit, and breathed on them—and the Princess stood up alive and well. The Pope was hugely relieved and sorry for his actions. The King was very much pleased, compensed them both with silver and gold.

They took the riches and left the country. On the way back, they stopped where they had earlier burried the reward from the previous king.

“Here is where we part. The money is yours,” said the old man. “Take my share too. And now go and serve in your parish faithfully. Don’t be greedy. Be kind and do good ”

Thus spoke the old man, and disappeared into thin air.

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